More Than Words....

Today, I was blessed by my dear friend Cami once again, she took the kids for the morning so I could rest. Quiet, for 4 hours...and I had time to think - to think without any other sweet voices calling for me. It was wonderful, blissful, needed, relaxing - but I did miss the little voices that have been the best part of my life for the last 4 years (besides of course Christopher, the love of my life for the past almost 8 years).
God - thank you. Thank you for you. Thank you for giving me a life that is full of joy, hardships, ups and downs. YOU are the reason I am in tears of gratefulness. Your love overflows out of my body, my mind and my heart. I cannot not tell anyone in words how He lives in each of us, we just have to ask Him in.

I have been loved on by so many people in my life, many times wondering why me? Why would they do this or that for me? In the last few weeks it has happened above and beyond. I needed a little extra help and I had an out-pouring of LOVE. It once again proves, He is in us all. He is the maker of giving, the maker of love, the maker of smiles, the maker of tears, the maker of sadness and the maker of it ALL. Even though some of these amazing people in my life don't necessarily believe in Him or seek Him - He is working in them (they just don't see it yet :) ).

I just do not know how anyone can deny the fact that He is the reason for us all, and He loves us right where we are. The good, the bad and the ugly. It is no simpler than that. HIM. That's all that it is about, not religion, not church, not things....it's about you and me and loving on each other and giving to one another. If we could just each seek Him, in our own places, right where we are at and call to Him, He will answer. Matthew 8:7-8 'Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be open.'

A beautiful woman whom I have gotten to know just a bit has a blog that she bares her soul in. She is in search of what/who God is. I loved reading what she had to say, her questions, her frustrations, her confusion...it made me think about what He is to me. So, that is where this is all coming from. I have this burning passion about Him, the knowledge and blessings he has waiting for each of us - waiting for us to seek Him so we can love on others and lead the broken to Him. I feel like I am so far from where I want my relationship to be with Him, I am broken too but in Him I am free from the things of this world. I have JOY. Joy in the sad times, hard times, great times. And when I can't see that it just may be His will in those hardships, God has one of my sisters in Christ call, email, stop by at just the right moment - even strangers sometimes show me the joy in my hardship. It is the most beautiful thing.

I seek Him, rely on Him and try my darnedest to put Him first and do his will for my life and my families life on a daily basis. I fall, I fail, I trip, I crash, I make big and small mistakes, I stray for a bit but the Glory of Him is that He forgives and forgets, we are human, He wants our hearts - he wants to blow our minds. I've seen it happen, I have heard amazing stories and watched it before my eyes. God, I love you with all my heart. Thank you for reaching down to pull me out of the pit I was once in. Thank you for molding me like clay, I'm still a lopsided, uneven pot, but I KNOW your hands are around that pot on your wheel, changing me, guiding me, leading me, showing me that your will is the way and the truth. Keep molding me Lord, help me to stay between your mighty hands. I only want what you want to my life, it means some really hard times, it means many glorious times, but I know that if I seek your face, you will carry me through and you will be glorified and there will ALWAYS be an outpouring of joy coming from my soul. You are my everything, more than words can say...